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Showing posts from May, 2018

Know, Grow or Borrow: How to Find Strengths When You Need Them

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Can you help someone find what they need to get through a problem?

In NLP, it's called eliciting resources.  We start with the belief that everyone has available to them a strength, skill or perception (called resources in NLP) that would help them solve the problems that matter to them. If they are not using that strength, skill or perception, then it's because they don't realize they have it. As a coach or influence, you can help them recognize that they already have what they need to move forward.

Why don't we know that we have something we need?  There are 2 reasons. The first is that our brains hold way more information than we can process in our conscious attention. We have to "forget" most of what we know to think clearly, since clear thought means processing only a few things at a time. The second reason is that we are social animals and we can access attitudes, experiences and skills by connecting to them in other people. We might not have what we ne…

Learning is not necessarily boring, scary or unfair: it just seems that way in our memories

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The easiest way for me to limit registration in a course or workshop is to put the word "learn" in the title. I've struggled with this for a long time: learning means acquiring the skills or information we need to do things we have never done before. It's hugely important in both innovating and adapting to change around us. But people cringe a little when they see it. It's like offering a course on flossing your teeth or giving up sugar.

I should not really be surprised. I was a full-time student from grade one through dissertation. I had some wonderful teachers and I loved to learn. But when I think about my earliest memories of school, this is what comes up for me. The class had behaved badly in some way (not me!) and the teacher made us sit on our hands until they hurt. And I was asked to be the demonstrator student for some new standardized tests, which meant I did all my tests in front of a room full of teachers. I don't really remember that part: I reme…