A group can help you build a bridge from your present to a more satisfying future


Reflection is powerful when it is specific and directed at the future. People are often afraid to reflect on their experience because they confuse reflection with beating themselves up for what they did or didn't say or do. They're also afraid that recognizing what is good in the present will somehow stop them from making change.

This is a reflex that keeps people stuck in old patterns. They may be thinking about the future, but they aren't building the bridge they need to get from here to there. The results are daydreams, wishes, and dissatisfaction without motivation.

The group above is finishing up a process that began with connecting to their curiosity and energy and then moved through going deeply, vividly into their lived experience. They were reflecting not just when they were sitting and writing privately, but also when they were asking questions, remembering, and laughing together. The group experience drew them into a kind of reflection that is often difficult to do on your own.

If you think that reflection is quiet and private, challenge that assumption. It's the same assumption that tells you to "think about it later." It's a wolf dressed up to look like common sense. Reflection is hard work: it's best done with support, laughter and shared energy. When you have a clearer sense of what is working for you in the present, you'll also have what you need to build a bridge into a more satisfying future.

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