The bear and the bunny

Once there was and was not a bear who was quick and funny and somewhat afraid of standing still. Bear loved to run and climb and splash in cold mountain streams. He was strong and fast and when he found other bears, he was equally happy competing or playing. Bear loved everything that allowed him to keep moving.

He didn't love standing still. Every fall, he put off hibernation until the last possible day. Every spring, he burst back into the world, full of energy and didn't stop moving till fall.

Bear loved to watch things moving that were even faster and stronger than he was. He watched eagles soar overhead and wished for wings. He moved along the shore, watching the whales and listening to their songs and he wished he could swim so far and so deep. He watched deer and admired their grace and endurance. As fast as he was and as strong as he was, Bear loved all things that were even faster or even stronger.

Even Bear had to stop to catch his breath sometimes. One day he had been testing himself, pushing himself to move faster than ever. He ran until he could not breathe, and then he stopped. Almost all his energy and focus turned to recovering as quickly as possible so he could run again. Almost all.

Some tiny fraction of his awareness was alert to the clearing around him. From the corner of his eye, he saw a flash of silver. It was moving quickly along the ground. He turned his head and looked more closely. As he did, Bunny stopped moving. The flash of silver became a small, solid, sleek grey bunny, so still it could have been carved from soft grey stone. Bunny was so still that he could see the shadow of her eyelashes and even the shadow did not move.

Bear discovered that his heart was no longer racing. It was beating comfortably, quietly in his chest. He began to notice that the restless movement that was part of his every waking moment was quieter, gentler. After a time, his eyes still on the bunny, he was absolutely still.

Bear was so curious about being still that he almost started to move again! His mind raced through his body, noticing how it felt to be still. For the first time, he let the slowness and balance in his body pull his mind to a new balance. Bunny looked into his eyes. Bear stopped.

Bear stopped moving. He stopped rushing. He stopped thinking. He just stopped. Part of him thought it was funny that a little grey bunny could stop a big brown bear. But he stopped anyway.

And then he held very still as Bunny moved, slowly, without fear and without hurry. Bunny moved toward him. And Bear was so still he even held his breath.

Bunny stopped a foot or two away. He looked down and she looked up. He watched her take a deep slow breath and as she let it out, he breathed with her. For a moment that felt like forever, Bear and Bunny looked at each other.

And so it began.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"Yes" sets for building agreement and manipulation

I recently watched a video of a solution-focus therapist working with a client. The clip began with a number of questions and statements with which the client would agree.  In hypnosis and sales, it's known as a "yes set." If you're not familiar with the concept, it works roughly like Simon Says.  In that game, you get into a pattern of doing what "Simon says" so that you eventually do what the leader says even when s/he does not insert the magic words "Simon says." In the "yes set," you get used to saying yes until such a strong pattern of agreement exists that you agree with statements or instructions you might not otherwise give your agreement. The more times in a row you have said "yes," the greater the probability that you will say "yes" to the next statement. Yes sets can be seen in two ways. The first is that you are offering someone evidence that you are observing and accepting their experience. When every
Read more

The hypnotic contract

Under what conditions would you allow someone else to tell you what to think?   If you have watched a stage hypnotist, you have seen what looks like one person exercising remarkable control over the thoughts and actions of another. It is fascinating, in part, because we have all seen it happen in real life. Suddenly someone we know seems to be relying on someone else to do the thinking.  Even if the influence is good, it is a little frightening. The secret is that there are no magic words.  In order to lead someone into hypnosis, that person has to be willing to go there. Often the people you see on stage are more than willing. For whatever reasons, they are enthusiastic about giving up self control and allowing someone else to take charge. They know that there are limits to what can happen on stage and they are only agreeing to give up control within those limits. What you see in hypnosis is an agreement between two people. Like all agreements between human beings, it stretches as far
Read more

The fine line between observations, suggestions and commands

I have been watching Tony Robbins this week in the documentary called " I Am Not Your Guru ." You can read a nicely ambivalent review in the Financial Times here.   I think the ambivalence is built into the process, which might be surprising given the loud celebration that characterizes the Date with Destiny in the film. For those of us whose work has evolved from NLP, there are lessons to be learned from modelling the most famous and successful practitioner of NLP (Robbins has far surpassed all the founders by all measures of success). Because he does so much so well, Robbins lets us see how fine the line is between observing and suggesting. Let me explain. Robbins frames his "interventions" both with the exercises and performances we do not see in the film and with his invitations. The film opens with an intervention with a young man who says he is suicidal; it is only later that we see Robbins say he is looking for someone who is suicidal to work with. Since
Read more